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The Ups, the Downs

My friend Patti asked me if I was doing okay. She was confused by my blog. One entry was upbeat and the next sad. I understand her confusion. What I am trying to do is report how I am in the moment... and right now that is a glorious mess. I had four really wonderful days where I was energetic and I danced about and was soaking in the joy. The past few days it has been me stuck in a bed again and sad, adrift. It is not nearly as bad as it was a month ago, but still so far from where I want to be.

I work at the toy store in a few hours. That is my focus now. I am going to move out for a few months and weigh my options and attempt to finally make a home somewhere.

Whew.

Tonight I write from Regi and Jer's place. Oz is barking in his crate. I listen to Gavin Creel and just hope for a nice sleep.

And to awake in a better place than I have found myself these past few days.

But if not, I will take one step and then another.

Oh depression, my how powerful.

Dustin

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