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enough


for months i have looked for you
tried the flings,
the sites,
the freedoms i never allowed myself

changed am i
never thought i,
the gay monk
would walk down some of these roads.

so full of fear,
so unknown,
why do we fear that which we do not know?
but we do

until
we can live in the fear and see that he wants to be our friend
sometimes he is warning us
often we misunderstand him

i was one of those...
rolling around in sexual guilt...
from where?
why?

live it up
enjoy
play
no regrets

the moments have washed over me
bringing new waves of promise
hurtful, tarnishing
unexpected, reveling

enough
i say
enough
not doing the searching today

jaded
not me, nor shall i ever be
that is a meek decision
i am not meek

i make this life
i alone am responsible
but enough
not looking now

perhaps
whomever you are
wherever you are
it is time for you to look

for me
for love
for what might be
for the chance

grateful
am i
for these past months
holding the hidden parts of me

exploring the me i never knew
i am free
i am laughing
but enough

a refrain pours from me:
no matter what you see
you can have what you dream
always wanted

a love
just one
who sees you
who you see...

no longer naive
am i
but standards
i have

shocked
to see parts of the world
i have
never known

my searching heart
must rest
from my refrain
the song that ushers me onward

enough i say
enough
you
come and find me

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