Today (Honesty's Hand)

Patterns emerging
Known within but never uttered
Now I choose to share
I have felt finished
broken
wasted
so far away from the me I thought I wanted

Troubling indeed
But in the past three
I have changed the steps I take
Not jumping into the same cycle

Not quite okay
But resolute
Perspective was lost
And although it is not quite found
I am holding honesty's hand
for the first time
in a long, long time

Looking at me
Not blaming
Smiling and saying,
It's time to try something new
Consistency is attainable
You are merely strangers
And need someone to acquaint you
Looking now...

So today, I will hold honesty's hand
And try to do the same tomorrow
But today, I held honesty's hand
And that makes me okay
Today

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Call to Action

This past Saturday I, with thousands of others across the country, attended a protest/rally of Proposition 8 and Act I (the adoption ban in Arkansas). My dear allies in this battle were Jay, Karen, their joyous son Quin, our mutual friend Greg, Amanda, Carter, Sarah Jane, Liz, and the brave Arkansans that showed up for the rally on the steps of our Capitol. It was bitterly cold and grey, but within I was ignited with passion and newfound purpose. As I listened to the stories of my fellow brothers and sisters, gay, straight, bisexual, transgendered, I was struck by the power of the many speaking as one. Then I began to visit my own story and was struck at how far I have come... to think back fourteen years ago when I had my brother tell my parents that I happened to be gay because I was so frightened as to what they would think, say, how they could ever love me, this abomination.... To now, a man standing with his friends and proclaiming "This is our right, What you have done is ...

The Kick Ass Brothers (And the Theatre Room I Am Going to Steal)

I just spent the day with my brothers, Bran Flakes and Patricio watching "Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood", "Sin City", and "Live Free or Die Hard" in Bran Flake's KICK ASS KICK ASS KICK ASS Theatre Room. (It deserves all three kick asses and then some actually.) It was a Testosterone Day and I made it all the way through. Can we say the same for Patricio? (Titty baby. Ha.) I think that was the first blog smack talk I have "thrown down". I had never seen "Sin City" or "Live Free or Die Hard". Both were excellent. I did not want to leave the nirvana that is the magic room of cinema wonder. So, thanks to Bran Flakes for hosting and for having the idea. And Patrick, let me know how that nipple is treating you. Here's to smack talk... How liberating! (Especially when I am in control of the forum!) Here's to a kick ass theatre room. And to even more kick ass brothers, Dustin

Scampering Back From the Hiatus

I awoke with these names in my head... surely they are characters from a forthcoming story tentatively entitled, "The Merman's Song": Briinan Jossuraje Arthero Zyne What a perplexing and delicious way to greet the morning, I love it when that happens. Jer is heading over to bond and I am trying to break the habit of making him wait when he arrives for me to finish getting ready. It is a tad ridiculous and just keeps happening, one of those atrocious habits that is born out of sheer laziness and poor time management skills. I just love, love, love, love that guy. If I am the toothbrush, he is the floss, the Ron to my Harry, the Patty to my Sandi, the Pepper to my Doctor, the Dorothy to my Rose, the world's best person and my FAVOURITE. He keeps me sane, he really does. The picture is from the wedding in which I performed last weekend. I think it is a classy and interesting shot. There is loads to deliver and reveal as I took a brief hiatus, not intentionally, but I...

Chronicles of Dustin Ashley Beam

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