In my daily walks, I do find a sense of self-comfort that I have never known. I am delighting in tiny things and rewarding myself with a soul pat for getting back in the school game.
I love this time of the year, it always makes me feel at home no matter where I am literally or emotionally. Halloween is such a great holiday and I am currently sifting through the many ideas I have for a possible ghoulish itinerary.
Just as I am mending one relationship, finding its rhythm again, another one baffles me with its curious state. I used to think that at some point I would get it all together, but I do not think it ever all comes together at the same time. I find humour and solace in that. Relationships are tricky. I think I am a decent friend, but I certainly like my alone time, I am odd, and have changed a great deal over the past few months. I guess it makes sense that what I needed in friendship is no longer exactly the same.
Today I started writing a scene for theatre class that will end up being a three to five minute musical about a man who does not want to wake up and the relationship between he and his alarm clock. I am personifying the alarm clock and he sings and so does the man. It is a fun little idea and I look forward to seeing where the muse takes me with this one.
I am so tremendously grateful for the gifts that have been bestowed upon me and doubly grateful that I see them for what they are: gifts.
I have been all over the place in the past few months: trying new things, meeting new people, looking at new careers... and it feels nice to slow down inside, to find a perfect calm. I do not think anything necessarily happened to cause the calm; it is just part of the rhythm of things, of life.
Now are the moments of calm, who knows how long they will stay with me, but I want to take the opportunity to hug them and hold them close to my spirit.
Calm and I are going to eat and fall asleep to the dulcet tones of "The West Wing."
Dustin
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